holiday, kinda like what life should
really be.
we are always chasing the
moments that take our breaths away.
they may take the form of
places, people, things or experiences.
there are places that are beautiful
way beyond imagination,
people who sweep you off your feet,
things that are just too amazing and
surreal experiences that words can never
do justice to.
i think we change a little bit everytime
we internalize them.
but i never really knew how to share or
express them to people
because i never want to reduce these moments
to just brief conversational topics
mentioned in passing.
i guess part of why they are breathtaking
is their transience, our inability to hold
on to these moments.
i don' t know, it could be the growing older,
i think i made some new observations.
1. i used to regard adulttalk as
superficial and somewhat mindless. i wondered
if adults all become this way but
i realised recently that it isn't
that we are all superficial but its just our way
of dealing with the really heavy stuff.
2. i always thought
when it comes to relationships,
they either turn out to be the
Greatest Romance of it All or A Really Bad Decision.
its a thin line, but sometimes the Greatest Romance of it All
takes the form of A Really Bad Decision or vice versa.
i used to consider the End technically like a
Probability Tree.
now i guess there's no probability.
there might not even be an end, there's nothing,
we only have now.
now is the only thing that's real.
so out with the holidays and
into my last academic semester,
where i should be preoccupied with
realworld blah and major brainwork.
i hope i'll be fine.
i thought i might have new perspective
this time but im not sure because
the madness of NTU always throws me
out of my own tempo.
i don't know yet, i plan to be ok.
8:38 AM